Who's still reading this thing?

So this is for anyone out there who actually reads this thing. I'm home. Back in the states. Back in Olympia.

I had some money issues. My debit card and credit card both became unusable and because of this I chose to end my trip early. I could have made it come together, borrowed money, had new cards sent to me but I took it as a sign that my time was up. It had been four months since I left Olympia and although I can't understand the feeling now, I was actually homesick. I think that India shocked and scarred me and I needed a break. I also wanted some good food and a bed that wasn't made from softened plywood.

Now that I'm back I'm trying to hold on to the momentum that I felt while there. My mind, to escape the harshness of my surroundings would veer towards the future and productivity. At the time I was almost bi-polar with with my desires. One moment I was thinking about my credit, school, and buying a house then I would be completely immersed in the world that I was living in at that time and in that space.

Although I knew that there was so much to gain from continuing on through India I was also ready for some stability and familiarity. And some red meat. I felt sure of my decision all of the way through my Valium induced coma flight home. And during my lay-over in Newark I had to fight the urge not to cry because I felt so wrong and wanted nothing more than to take my decision back and return to India.

But I'm here now and it's only a matter of time before I'm gone again. School starts in three weeks, job prospects are looking good, snowboarding season is just around the corner, and my friends are enough to help me fool myself into thinking that I have made the right decision.

If anyone has been reading this that doesn't have my e-mail and would like to correspond or just say hello, then here it is.

thascavenga@yahoo.com

Peace